’About me’, what could I possibly say? It’s a fiction really, the story I would tell. A story with convoluted wanderings into small dark rooms as well as wide open fields. It’s hardly what you might say is ‘about me’, it’s not really ‘me’, it’s the path I have wandered, perhaps. Anyhow, technicalities aside, the path has been pretty muddlesome of late, and downright terrifying at times if I am to be honest.
This is what I want to blog about- my day to day. I want to open it up- I want to cast out the secrecy and let the fresh air in. I want my friends and family and whoever else needs to know, to know what is present for me. I want to connect with you through my transparency. I’m tired of the front, the image of myself- I long for freedom and honesty. I’m tired of smiling at people and then walking away in tears. There is too much in my life that goes unsaid, and therefore unwitnessed. This has gone on for too long.
I’ve put up with a lot, for a long time, I’ve learnt a bunch of stuff, and no doubt have much more to learn. But I’m ready to share NOW, not when I have attained the impossible perfection that I have long aimed for- I want to share not as a teacher, but as a human- a human like you- a human who is struggling. And as a human who loves to write, I thought this would be a good way to lay things bare.
At this time, my kidneys have 14% function, this is what ‘seems’ to be the problem. But let us see what unfolds as we travel together through this blogging experience.
My current intention is to post everyday- taking one small part of that day and exploring it. I like to write quickly and not edit my work too much, I want to share what feels real as I write, not demonstrate perfection as a writer at this time. I hope you will enjoy.
May all Beings be free,